The Good Wife: Are you struggling balancing between your career and your home life?

I Don't Know How She Does It

Having been raised in Venezuela there was always a big focus around la familia. You can study, work, make friends, party and so on, but family comes first!  And I love that about our culture; that is, until I started getting stress headaches, anxiety attacks and gaining weight because I was trying to be the perfect wife + mom + Project Manager at work.

If I was at work, I was feeling guilty about not being home and spending time with my daughter and my husband.  If I was home, I was worried about getting just one more email out so that my boss could see that I was invested and all in when it came to my career.

It was crazy! I would work 65 hours/week and run home to bake cookies… except my daughter would be already asleep because it was so late. Then I would invite my husband to watch a movie, you know and get some snuggle and make out time with my handsome man… except I would fall asleep on his shoulder five minutes in.

Oh Yeah, you can picture that sexy scene: my hair all tousled, my make up still on, mouth fully open and snoring out loud. 

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Eventually I figured it out though:  BOUNDARIES

It’s all about setting boundaries, expectations and communication.

I started communicating more effectively with my coworkers and higher ups.  They knew I was dedicated to my work.  They also knew that my family was a priority.  So, if I had to run home at 3PM to take my daughter to her pediatrician and then log into that “can’t wait till tomorrow” 6PM conference call, I would do it! I did have a really amazing team of people I was working with (for the most part). So, that added to my success.

I also took full advantage of technology.  I would log into my work email very early in the morning and answer a few high priority emails before anybody was even sitting at their desks yet.  Then, I would log off and go enjoy breakfast with my kiddo and drop her off at school. That way I wouldn’t have to rush her through and miss out on enjoying those moments because I had to go check into my Outlook Inbox.

But most importantly, I was present at work when I was at work and present at home when I was at home.  It creates boundaries not only with other people (husband, supervisors, etc) but also within yourself.  And it alleviates those pangs of anxiety that leave you unfulfilled and feeling like no matter what you’re doing, it’s just not good enough.

The bottom line is, life is messy! There is no such thing as perfect.  It’s more about harmony than about balance.

Here is what I want you to do:

  • First of all, I want you to define what YOUR perfect harmonious life looks like (in terms of home-career synchronicity)
  • Make a list of your “MUST-haves” in order to fill successful, both as a woman and as a (insert job title here): how many hours a week do you aim to spend with your husband/boyfriend/kids? do need to have your hair picture perfect every day? home cooked meals?
  • Enlist help! You don’t HAVE to do it all! Ask your husband/boyfriend to pitch in.  You’ll be surprised how much they appreciate being asked. Delegate tasks (both at home and at work) that are easy to hand off. Can you afford hiring someone to help you clean the house?

Be creative! And make sure that above it all, you’re still enjoying life! That’s what it’s all about.  There is no amount of money, promotions, and letters after your name that will make up for having missed your kid’s recital or growing apart from your husband or putting your own health at risk.

I want to know how you do it?  What tips or thoughts do you have about successfully satisfying your role at home as well as at the office? Write your answers in the comment box below!

 



Abrazos,

Jennifer

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Jennifer Kent is an award-winning entrepreneur who helps you define your dream career and ditch your boring job.

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About The Author

Jennifer Kent

Jennifer Kent is an award-winning entrepreneur who helps you define your dream career and ditch your boring job.